Silent Pleas
by Jiko-kun
Summary: When you learn something traumatic about someone's childhood, things change. HieiBotan
1. Prologue

Silent Pleas ~~~~~*~~~~~*~~~~~*~~~~~*~~~~~*~~~~~*~~~~~*~~~~~*~~~~~*~~~~~*~~~~~  
  
This is a Hiei/Botan fic. Please leave if you do not like them as a couple, or do not like fan fictions putting them together. Do not flame me because you do not have the same opinions on Yu Yu Hakusho couple that I do. This will be a darker fic. Do not go on if you do not like tragedy/angst fics.  
  
Disclaimer: All Yu Yu Hakusho characters belong to Yoshihiro Togashi. My ideas belong to ME. Plagiarism of my ideas will NOT be accepted.  
  
NO JAPANESE CASUAL WORDS WILL BE USED IN THIS FIC! (As much as I like it, I know some people don't understand it)  
  
~~~~~*~~~~~*~~~~~*~~~~~  
  
I am a deity of death. People say that it's insane that I'm so cheerful, yet I take souls to the afterlife. Yet, no one knows my real self. I block my mind off to others. Not even Hiei, with his Jagan, can see into my mind. I have learned that this technique would be useful when I was appointed as a ferry girl. Humans with six senses could read my mind and tell when I was lying about what I thought. So I made it seem that my mind was bubbly, simple, forgetful, and happy all the time. I even tried to make myself like that. Unfortuanetly, I could never accomplish that feat.  
  
Now, we're on another mission to go and get a priceless artifact that has been stolen by a demon. The demon is huge, grotesque, and frightening. It has three heads, five arms, each with razor sharp claws on it that look like they drip poison. But we face it anyways, to do our duty. Yusuke dodges the creature's claws, and then looks to Kurama, who is battling with its other arm, and so is Hiei. Then Yusuke looks at me, and yells something indistinguishable at me. I glance at him with a confused look on my face. Then he points behind me, and I realize, too late, that the claw is about to hit me.  
  
I feel something cut through the flesh on my right arm. Deep. I feel excruciating pain, and then my world turns into blackness as I hit the hard ground. The last thing I hear is Yusuke using his Rei Gun, and a scream from the demon.  
  
~~~~~*~~~~~*~~~~~*~~~~~  
  
"...So you see, when the poisonous claws sunk into Botan, the poison had a different affect. She is a ferry girl, and therefore she is special. Something happened, but we in the afterlife are not sure what, exactly. We think that she know has a certain ability that we do not know about. Keep good watch over her."  
  
I choose that time to groan and try to sit up. As my eyes flicker open, I notice that I am in Yusuke's house. I glance down. I'm laying on a futon, stained with my blood. As I look to my arm, I notice a white/red bandage/sling on it. I realize that if the claws went any deeper, my arm could've been ripped off. I shudder at that thought.  
  
"Botan! Are you okay?" Keiko asks, pushing past all the others in the house to get to me. I put on my façade once more and smile.  
  
"I'm fine, Keiko! Please don't worry about me! I'll be as good as new in no time at all!" I grin and look around me. Most of the others are smiling in relief, happy with my lie. All except Hiei. He glances at me for a moment, studying my facial features, then looks away. I think he knows that I'm not really who I pretend to be, but I can never be sure. But I must be careful around him anyways. He is incredible unpredictable.  
  
"So, did we defeat the demon?" I ask, smiling at Yusuke, remembering hearing the Rei Gun before I blacked out. "How long have I been asleep?"  
  
"Yes, we did defeat the demon." Yusuke says, looking proud. "And you've only been sleeping for a day. Don't worry."  
  
"Okay! Well, I'm better now! Let's go and do something!" I grin at everyone, and everyone except Hiei grins back.  
  
"Well, I must be going." Koemna says, and is instantly gone.  
  
I grin madly, willing the pain in my arm to go away. As I try to stand from the futon, I gasp from the pain and stumble. Kurama and Keiko, the closest ones to me, gently hold me upright.  
  
"Thanks guys!" I smile, and call my oar to come. I jump on it and pretend that there is no pain in my arm. That the excruciating pain is gone. It won't go away, but I can try.  
  
Hiei is still reading my expression. I pray to Buddha that he will not see through me. And if he does, that he does not tell anyone.  
  
~~~~~*~~~~~*~~~~~*~~~~~  
  
It's a chilly night, and I hug myself, still ignoring the pain. I know I need to go and visit Hiei, and I know I need to talk to him. He knows that I am not who I am leading everyone else to believe. If he tells anyone that, I will not be the same person, and they will not like me as much... I have to do this. To forget everything that happened to me in my human life. To start anew.  
  
I spot him in his tree, his right leg swinging down, and his cape blowing in the wind. I wonder why he doesn't get cold. Then I remind myself that he's half ice demon.  
  
"Hiei? We need to talk." I say, dropping the act and looking up at him seriously. "Now. Come down from there and face me."  
  
He looks down at me for a second; keeping his expressionless, unreadable face on, and then gracefully jumps down to the ground.  
  
"You know that I am putting on an act. Don't pretend you don't." I say, glaring at him straight in the eye.  
  
"Hn." He says, throwing back my gaze with one equally cold. "The question is: why are you putting up an act in the first place?"  
  
I hesitate, and I know he saw that. And probably would use it to his advantage. If your enemy falters, it's time to talk action.  
  
"You're going to live your whole life as a lie. Pathetic." Hiei turned around and prepared to jump back up into his tree.  
  
"Wait! Hiei! You must not-" I touched his back, and was cut short.  
  
He stiffened, and so did I... something was happening, and I was seeing it within my mind. I tried to let go... but I couldn't. Something in me wouldn't let me. So I was forced to watch whatever I was seeing.  
  
~~~~~*~~~~~*~~~~~*~~~~~ Within Botan's Mind ~~~~~*~~~~~*~~~~~*~~~~~  
  
A pack of ice demons.  
  
A young woman was beside a desolately high cliff, clutching two small ragged bundles in her arms. She was sobbing uncontrollably, and refused to let go of the bundles.  
  
"Please, no!" She cried, desperate, as the bundles were taken away from her clutching hands. "Take me! Spare my children!"  
  
One of the other women looked close to tears, too. She was given one of the bundles, and was told by another of the older women to throw it off the cliff.  
  
"...But first," one of the women said, "we will take care of the mother."  
  
They plunged a blade into the sobbing woman who was moments ago clutching her babies/bundles. Her cries were instantly stopped.  
  
The women who was given one of the bundles picked up a pearl that the other, now dead, woman had shed and gave it to the bundle.  
  
"If you ever want revenge," she whispered to the bundle, "Let this guide you."  
  
She then dropped it off the cliff.  
  
~~~~~*~~~~~*~~~~~*~~~~~  
  
I gasped and flung my hand off of Hiei. I backed up, not knowing what he would do. I knew I just had a glimpse into his past, and he saw it too.  
  
Hiei's stiff back didn't move for a long while. Only one word was uttered between us.  
  
"Mother."  
  
Then he faced me, and with the expression of a wild animal caught in a cage, he dashed off into the night.  
  
I started to sob, not knowing exactly why. I was sure that I would find out soon enough.  
  
~~~~~*~~~~~*~~~~~*~~~~~  
  
Do not steal my ideas.  
  
R&R is you want some more chapters. I want 5-10 reviews before I keep on going. 


	2. Please

Silent Pleas ~~~~~*~~~~~*~~~~~*~~~~~*~~~~~*~~~~~*~~~~~*~~~~~*~~~~~*~~~~~*~~~~~  
  
Same as last chapter. Do not steal my ideas, do not read this particular fic if you do not like Hiei/Botan pairings, and please R&R if you like it. If you do not like this fic, do not flame me... go vent your feelings on a piece of paper or something.  
  
Disclaimer: I do not own Yu Yu Hakusho. All Yu Yu Hakusho characters belong to Yoshihiro Togashi.  
  
~~~~~*~~~~~*~~~~~*~~~~~One Week Later~~~~~*~~~~~*~~~~~*~~~~~  
  
It is a warm night. I look out of my window and gaze into the quiet night. I am in Yusuke's house, because my arm still pains me, and everyone can see that. I hear Kurama and Yusuke talking in low voices, trying to be as silent as possible. I can still hear them, no matter what they do. I wouldn't call it eavesdropping, considering that it is probably about me.  
  
"Yusuke, I'm really worried about Botan. She has been extremely quiet for a week. Do you think that something happened to her? I haven't seen Hiei around for about that time, too." I hear Kurama say. Unfortuanetly, he is right, I have been quiet, and I have been putting down my act somewhat. I have to fix that.  
  
"Well, do you think that something happened between those two? Something... BIG?" Yusuke says. That pervert! If I was feeling better, I would go out there and slap him.  
  
"Yusuke, this is no time for fun. We must find out what's wrong with Botan, and find Hiei. I think that something happened that they do not want to talk about. We must find out for their sake."  
  
"All right. You try to find Hiei, and I'll get Botan."  
  
And with that, they were done. I wonder where Hiei is. Is he still thinking about what happened a week ago? I hope not. It was an accident... of a sort. I still don't know how, or what, happened. I suppose I'll have to tell the Reikai Tantei soon. But later... I think as I fall into a dreamless slumber.  
  
~~~~~*~~~~~*~~~~~*~~~~~  
  
When I awaken, it's the wake of dawn. The sky is a light pink, and the sun is slowly rising on the horizon. I sneak out of the room that Yusuke has provided me. I can hear Yusuke's contented snores as he sleeps. I wistfully wish that I was like that.  
  
I know that I must find Hiei, and ask him about... what happened. I'm not sure if he'll talk to my, never mind try and understand what happened, but I have to try. I summon my oar, and run outside. After jumping on it quickly, I fly up to look for Hiei.  
  
What a beautiful sight. Me, alone, looking into the clouds and the sky. It's times like these that I wish I was alive, and able to enjoy things like this, inside of only catching fleeting glimpses of it when I'm busy on work.  
  
Oh well. No time for fantasizing now. I must find Hiei before the day is done. It's my fault that he ran away. My fault. Isn't it always my fault? I wonder why that is.  
  
I sigh and look around. He could be on the other side of the world with his speed! But then again, where would a sadistic fire/ice demon be? Probably in...  
  
I get an idea, and quickly fly off to find him.  
  
~~~~~*~~~~~*~~~~~*~~~~~  
  
I look down, getting my bearings. I suddenly realize that I'm in the right spot, and fly down to see if my guess was correct as to where Hiei was.  
  
It is a lush green forest. Quiet, beautiful, and full of green leaved trees, it provides comfort to all nature-loving people. Like myself. Perhaps Hiei will be here, sitting in a tree. But which one... Suddenly, I spot a tall tree to the right of me. I fly myself down to the highest branch in the tree, and see Hiei there, his arms folded behind his head, looking at the sky. Just as I suspected he would be.  
  
"Hiei?" I ask, lowering my oar so that it is right next to him. "We need to talk."  
  
Hiei turns away and doesn't speak. Maybe he has a right to do that. But we have to talk about this. And find out what happened.  
  
"Hiei! Listen to me! Please!" I plead. How odd. Me, the deity of death, pleading. It would be a funny situation if it was not so serious.  
  
"Hn." Hiei says, his back still to me. Well, at least he is speaking to me.  
  
"Please Hiei! I know... it's hard for you, but..." I averted my eyes.  
  
"Botan, go away." He said, sighing in defeat.  
  
"HIEI!" I yell, so loudly that the birds from all around fly away. THAT'S IT!  
  
I shake the tree branch that he is sitting on, and he, startled and off-guard, falls off. In a nanosecond, he is on my oar, I having caught him right before he touched the ground.  
  
"Hiei, look, let's talk." I say, regaining my calm posture. I fly up, with him clutching my oar.  
  
"Please, Hiei, talk to me. I can see into your memories, and you know that. Can't you talk to me about it? It may be tough, but you can't keep things like that bottled up inside!" I say as quietly as I could, so only he could hear me.  
  
"Hn." Hiei said, facing away, still gripping my oar.  
  
I sighed. Was he ever going to talk about this with me? I can't help him understand his pain. But I just can't let him deal with it by himself. I can't let him keep this bottled up inside of him. It would be cruel. I have to help him... no matter what.  
  
"Hiei." I say, calmly looking at his back. "Let me help you. I can help you with your emotions. I'm not a therapist, but... I'll do anything I can. You can't keep your emotions bottled up, Hiei. It'll destroy you from the inside out."  
  
I saw a little of the tension in his shoulders loosen, and then he muttered something under his breath.  
  
"Fine. Just let me down."  
  
I smiled. It was a start.  
  
~~~~~*~~~~~*~~~~~*~~~~~  
  
Next Chapter will be from Hiei's point of view, and not Botan's. Please review; I want 10-20 reviews this time before I finish another chapter. You have all been very good about reviewing, and I thank you. ~Bows~  
  
Remember, 10-20 reviews! So press that little button and pick 'Submit Review' and then submit your review! No flames. Only PRODUCTIVE criticism allowed. Do not copy/steal my ideas and stories! ^-^ Thank You. 


	3. Help

Silent Pleas ~~~~~*~~~~~*~~~~~*~~~~~*~~~~~*~~~~~*~~~~~*~~~~~*~~~~~*~~~~~*~~~~~  
  
Hello. I know I haven't gotten as many reviews as I'd like to have, but this will just have to do. I was wondering if there should be more Hiei/Botan fluff, and if it should be right now or in the later chapters. Please answer me within your reviews!  
  
I was also wondering if Botan or Hiei should have a rival... just to make it more interesting. (I think it would be interesting if Botan had a rival for Hiei... it would be funny in my opinion)  
  
Without further ado, here is the story.  
  
'.' = Thoughts "." = Talking . = Conscience ~~~~~*~~~~~*~~~~~*~~~~~  
  
'Ok, Botan.' I thought to myself as I dropped Hiei off on the ground. 'If he doesn't want to tell me the easy way, he'll just have to tell me the HARD way.'  
  
So, I flew to my apartment, went inside, grabbed a pen and paper and sat at my table. I started to write. It was time to make a plan.  
  
~~~~~*~~~~~*~~~~~*~~~~~  
  
1 Hour Later  
  
~~~~~*~~~~~*~~~~~*~~~~~  
  
"Whew! I did it! A fool-proof plane!" I cheered as I victoriously held up two sheets of paper filled with my small writing. 'I hope that he doesn't get mad at me... oh well. He can't keep those feelings bottled up inside. I just hope that he'll give in soon...'  
  
'Yes, but is it Hiei proof?' I thought, and looked over it again. After I finished and realized that no one could get out of the trap I had set for Hiei, I grabbed my oar and ran outside.  
  
~~~~~*~~~~~*~~~~~*~~~~~  
  
"Koemna!" I yelled as I walked up to his desk, bowing deeply, although I absolutely despise bowing every time I see him.  
  
Koemna sighed at motioned for me to stop bowing. He looked at me and set down his stamp on his desk, peering up at me.  
  
"Yes, Botan?" He said exasperatedly. "What is it THIS time?"  
  
"Koemna," I said, looking at him cutely, although if I wasn't doing this for a good reason I would never have done it. "Could I have about fifty demon wards? You know, the kind that don't let demons out, no matter how strong their ki is?" (A/N- I'm sorry, but I couldn't find a better word for this than ki. Ki is the energy that demons have. Very sorry!)  
  
"Yes, we just got some in." He said, looking at me curiously, handing me the demon wards in a big box that he had after I had done speaking. "But why do you need them? And why do you need so many? Only a few are needed for those weak demons that you usually fight..."  
  
"Thank you!" I said, cutting him off. Not wanting to explain, I rushed outside and jumped off my oar. 'Now all I need to do is get the bait...'  
  
~~~~~*~~~~~*~~~~~*~~~~~  
  
"Oh Hiei!" I yelled up at the tree I knew he was in. "How about you come down here?"  
  
"Hn." He answered, not even bothering to look down. I smiled, knowing he would be like this. 'Now, time to get this started...'  
  
"I suppose that I'll have to eat this ice cream all by myself then..."  
  
In the blink of an eye, he was standing beside me, looking suspiciously at me. I mentally cheered, but kept innocence written all over my face.  
  
"Sweet snow?" He said, still looking at me with suspicion.  
  
"Yes! Sweet snow! Come with me, and I'll bring you to it." I said cheerfully, motioning for him to get on my oar, which I had called up moments ago.  
  
He cautiously got onto my oar and held on tightly. I brought us to an abandoned warehouse that I knew no one was using.  
  
"In there, Hiei." I said, motioning for him to go into the warehouse. 'I hope this works.'  
  
When he ran into the warehouse and found the gallon of ice cream I had put in there, I knew that I had some time to spare. But, nonetheless, I quickly went to my work. In less than two minutes, the warehouse was decorated with demon wards.  
  
Just as quickly, Hiei was done eating his sweet snow. Luckily, I was done my work. I heard the doorknob being turned. But the door wouldn't open, no matter how hard Hiei tried. Suddenly, Hiei realized the trap he had been lead into.  
  
"LET ME OUT!"  
  
~~~~~*~~~~~*~~~~~*~~~~~  
  
Another chapter. Well, tell me what you think should happen. I would like to hear your ideas. I know its short... sorry about that. Maybe next chapter will be longer. That is, if I get a lot more reviews. This time, I want 20-30 reviews before I do another chapter. More Botan/Hiei fluff if you do! (^-^) Please?  
  
SO PRESS THAT BUTTON RIGHT THERE! You know you want to... 


	4. Me

Silent Pleas ~~~~~*~~~~~*~~~~~*~~~~~*~~~~~*~~~~~*~~~~~*~~~~~*~~~~~*~~~~~*~~~~~  
I'm incredibly sorry to all of the fans of this story! (If there are any) I am guilty of not updating for a long time. Please forgive me. My Internet was down, and I was sick, and the list goes on and on. I shall try to update more often.  
  
I believe that I should put some Hiei/Botan fluff into the next few chapters. Not until, of course, Botan gets the truth out of Hiei. I do have a good idea about how that's going to work out. Don't worry.  
  
bDisclaimer: I do not own Yu Yu Hakusho. If I did, Hiei and Botan would be a couple./b  
  
Onto the story!  
  
PS: This will be in Hiei's point of view in this chapter.  
  
~~~~~*~~~~~*~~~~~*~~~~~  
  
"HIEI! TELL ME NOW!" Botan screams, still trying to get me to co-operate. No matter how hard she tries, though, I won't. The memories are still too fresh, the wounds I will not allow to be re-opened.  
  
I shook my head to clear these thoughts. No. I will not allow myself to think like that. Soon, she will let me out of this pit of hell... once she thinks that I have given up.  
  
Two days we've been like this. I believe that her patience is wearing thin. I don't want to do this, but... it is for the best. I suppose that I could always kill her if she says that I did this.  
  
"Botan." I say weakly, putting my hands on the ground, "I give up. I'll tell you everything, just as soon as you let me out of this place."  
  
She said nothing, but I can tell that she is suspicious. After all, this is me that she is thinking about. I am, after all, a famous murderer and thief. I smile bitterly, remembering that those days are behind me.  
  
"Ok." She says, and takes the wards off of the door.  
  
I wait until she opens the door. With my nature speed, I pull out my sword, run behind her, and put my sword to her neck.  
  
I hear her gulp and stiffen. I smirk, plotting my revenge. NEVER mess with me.  
  
"Well, Botan," I whisper, my breath tickling her ear. "How shall I get my revenge for tricking me? Shall I kill you now, bath in your blood, and then say a demon got you? Or shall I wait until your least expecting it, then kill you slowly?"  
  
She shivers, and I smirk. I know that these are empty threats. I couldn't kill Botan if I wanted to. To do so would earn me a life in the worst spot Koemna could find in all of the demon and human realm.  
  
"Now, if you ever speak of this again, I will kill you before you even have time to scream. You will encounter the wrong end of my sword, and no one ever lives to tell the tale after they meet my sword. Understand, woman?"  
  
She quickly nods, her blue hair bouncing up and down with the energy of her nodding. I smirk once more, and then use my speed to get away before she can spot me.  
  
As I lie in my tree, I have a feeling nagging at me. My instincts tell me that Botan hasn't given up yet. She is stubborn. My instincts are not usually wrong.  
  
I ignore it and fall asleep. She will never hear the story of my past. I have never told anyone, and never plan to. She says that it is wrong to bottle up my emotions, but I have lived this way for all of my life, and I do not plan to change now.  
  
~~~~~*~~~~~*~~~~~*~~~~~  
  
Aiii! Short chapter... I'm sorry, for all of those who did not accept my apology before. I do hope that you do not flame me, as I will answer those back with nothing but hate. ^-^  
  
THANK YOU ALL OF MY REVIEWERS! I swear, I will answer back to your comments! To all of those who reviewed each chapter, Arigatou! (=^-^=) *Kirby gives all of you reviewers a cookie*  
  
Please review! 


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